Dinosaurs Went Extinct Because They Were Gay
Many paleontologists are coming to the conclusion that dinosaurs went extinct because they were gay. According to MIT scientist Dr. Irwin McCorynouat, “There is a growing body of paleontological evidence of widespread dinosaur homosexuality. Apparently many dinosaur species lack of interest in the opposite sex led to a reproduction decline that led to their demise.”
Although some scientists still believe a cataclysmic event such as a comet or climate change killed off the dinosaurs several fossil sites are throwing a monkey wrench into old theories. In a recent University of Montana dig researchers found two male dinosaur skeletons who died together in a loving embrace. Researchers are seeing simular gay entwined fossil positions at paleontological sites world wide. Paleontologists have unearthed several dinosaur species, such as the megasaurass and the lickalotapus, in various locations engaged in homosexual activities.
According to Dr. McCorynouat, “Scientists have long been perplexed about the dinosaur demise. Some ideas, for example, the theory that a meteoroid crashed into the Yucatan changing the earth's climate, seemed plausible—but they all had holes. Bizarre as the gay theory is, once you examine it, it is the most plausible theory yet for dinosaur extinction. A preponderance of homosexuality can have advantages by relieving over population pressures. For millions of years the earth was very tropical and the earth produced plenty of leafy foods for vast dinosaur populations. But eventually dinosaur populations grew so immense that natural selection favored homosexuality to curtail populations. But eventually homosexuality went too far and the gay dinosaurs failed to reproduce themselves.”
Dr. Imeal Krackerbouts, an expert who has written extensively on the science of homosexuality said, “We have seen homosexuality in modern animals such as in lesbian seagulls. Homosexuality was accepted in many ancient societies such as in Greece and Rome. These gay occurrences may have also been in response to population pressures.”
We asked Dr. Krackerbouts, “Could this theory fuel the anti gay religious right propaganda machine that gay acceptance could wipe out the human race like it did the dinosaurs?”
“No,” responded Dr. Imeal Krackerbouts, ”because, the religious right does not believe in the fossil record. And the vast majority of people are still heterosexual and we have a huge problem with overpopulation. Also, the gay dinosaurs did not have at their disposal artificial insemination, test tube babies, sperm donation and turkey basters. So the chance that humans will go extinct due to an increase in the gay population is unlikely.”
Comments
of Carbon Based Units, but in this case it is clear that humans are the result of unnatural unions between birdlike lizards and
the infamous Crimean Slugworm. Since normal breeding would be impossible, these creatures must have been gay, and
we are their legacy.
We are gay, we are religious, and we are always right.